Colca Canyon

We were picked up the day of the trip at 7.30am, which is a lie in to be honest, by our guide in a minibus. He had a name which I cant pronounce, but I do know the driver was called Hugo. It would take about 3 hours to get to the nearest town to the canyon, Chivay, where we would be staying for the night before going to the condor viewing bit of the canyon the following day. We picked up two more travellers on the way, a couple, she was from Belgium and he was from Peru, Puno to be precise, more about them later. Our guide was a strange bloke, looked more like an artist than a guide, curly hair, very small square glasses, seldom smiled, never without his scarf. Didn't talk much to begin with, but improved as we went on. He had to say everything twice, once in English, for our ignorant tongues, and once in Spanish for the bloke from Peru. I get so sick of foreign words being spoken over my head, constantly trying to figure out if he is telling them more than he is telling us, the suspicion can drive you mad. The road to Chivay was pretty treacherous, we scaled up and up mountain roads, apparently over the highest point that the road goes over in Peru at over 5000 meters (bloody high). At points we had no choice but to overtake some HGV's that were crippled to a snail pace due to the climb, nothing like a game of Russian roulette as Hugo did this around blind corners, to warm the cockles. At one point we passed a coach that was off the side of the road, on its roof! Looked like it had happened a day or two ago so we kept moving. We were soon at the peak where we stopped to take some pictures of some Bambi like creatures, Lou loved them, they literally all looked like Bambi, all blinking and stuff, couldn't get that close though, they must of heard what humans did to their famous brother. After this we stopped at a random little place where we could have some tea and a sandwich. We sat with our little travelling buddies and got to know them a bit better. Turned out that she is a translator who can speak five languages (I'll call her Tranny), always wore a bandana making her look bald, had her sleeves in everything all the time, asked far too many questions and was just one of the most irritating people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. He seemed fine though, he couldn't speak a word of English, was 4 foot tall with a face that, apart from the colour, was the spit of Murphy aka Robocop. He had the odd mortifying attempt at spitting out some English, but upon failing remained relatively quiet. After a lot longer driving we arrived at a sanctuary like hotel where everyone was staying, apart from us, where we would have some lunch before continuing to the hot springs near Chivay. This place was beautiful, in the middle of no-where, the views around the place were lush green, and there were hammocks outside where you could totally relax, which we both loved. As soon as we sat down to lunch the Tranny started being irritating again, turning square on to face me, asking me things and then telling me that she's done it already, and advising me what I can do or what I should have done. frightening. After what seemed like days, the Artist and Hugo turned up, and that was when the Peruvian boyfriend really came into his own. He didn't shut up. I can not believe that somebody can talk so much. Obviously apart from us pair, the 4 others could speak Spanish, and he really seemed to take a shine to the guide. He went on and on and on, no one else spoke, not a word, just him, he had a load of food in front of him, and took a tiny bite every 10 minutes, it was ridiculous. I'd finished my starter, main and pudding whilst he was still on the starter, whittering on. I made signs to Lou that we should make for the hammocks, but she was keen to show good manners and remain until everyone had finished. I tried to keep busy, going off to make a cup of tea, or faking the need for the toilet, just so I could be away from the table. After much much longer, I could see that Lou had had enough too, so announced that we were going outside to relax. At that point our relationship with Tranny and the Imp was over.

After dinner we went to the hot springs which were absolutely beautiful. It was less natural in design, more of a complex of outdoor swimming pools, 5 in total, 3 for anyone, 2 that were for locals only. The source of all the water however, was a natural hot spring so you can imagine how nice they were, right between the mountains, so relaxing. After this we were taken to our hotel, which was equally beautiful and much nearer to the town centre than the other place, meaning that we would be able to go out for dinner.When we ventured out it was raining so we went to the first place we came across. A spicy pizza and omelette later and we were in the Irish bar opposite. Amazing where you can find Irish bars these days. The pub was small, with a snooker table in the middle occupying most of the space (set up to play pool) and visitors graffiti all, and I mean all, over the walls, ceiling, lamp shades, tables, and bar. We had a good time in there, Lou nailed off a fair few G&T's and we had a game of pool, which took forever as the balls were almost too big for the pockets.

The following day we were picked up by the circus, and driven up a very bumpy road to the condor viewing point of Colca Canyon. We stopped quite a few times to admire the breath taking views over the valleys, and took some good pics. It turned out that this was a good idea because once we got above the canyon itself, it was full of cloud. There were loads of tourists there, all looking out for the illusive sacred birds. One guy there kept banging on about seeing 3 or 4 earlier on. I think if he's stayed too long he would have been sacrificed off the side of the canyon by a very eager bunch of Canadians, to see if it improved our condor viewing chances. We stayed an hour or maybe two, and although very nice, it was fruitless in terms of the sacred bird. A little disappointed we started our drive back down the mountain. We stopped once at the side of the road to enjoy another view, and then carried on. We then starting coming to a halt again, and to be honest we felt as though we had got the picture now and didn't necessarily need to take another picture of the same valley. Then out of no-where, the most beautiful site, an enormous bird flew from below us, over our heads, the condors had arrived. We were very lucky in the end, we must have seen five of them soaring around us, such amazing creatures, they have a wing span of around 3 meters and to see them swooping around us was absolutely incredible, we took photos and videos and as there were a few people there on the same bank, we shared it with a few people, it was just amazing. Fair play to the artist, if he hadn't kept making us stop, we would never have seen them. x